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Nov. 1st, 2015 08:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
scarfmanYou know, while I appreciate them, I don’t need expressions of concern every time I mention my wife’s passed away. It’s been fourteen months. It’s status quo.
There was one person who offered condolences this week because she hadn’t seen any post about it until now, and that’s fair. If you find out someone’s got married while you were away you say congratulations. But once. When someone’s stopped being married you don’t need to offer condolences every time they mention it.
There is a melancholy that’s never going to go away and sometimes I post about that, yes, like that LJ post earlier this week about other LJ posts about losses. But sometimes mentioning it in a post is just housekeeping, like that post about Netflix M*A*S*H earlier this week. Any melancholy in that post was more about watching M*A*S*H since 1974 than it was about being married a long time and then not.
Thanks for your sympathy, honestly, but let’s try something: from now on when it’s a grief post I’ll say so up front.
There was one person who offered condolences this week because she hadn’t seen any post about it until now, and that’s fair. If you find out someone’s got married while you were away you say congratulations. But once. When someone’s stopped being married you don’t need to offer condolences every time they mention it.
There is a melancholy that’s never going to go away and sometimes I post about that, yes, like that LJ post earlier this week about other LJ posts about losses. But sometimes mentioning it in a post is just housekeeping, like that post about Netflix M*A*S*H earlier this week. Any melancholy in that post was more about watching M*A*S*H since 1974 than it was about being married a long time and then not.
Thanks for your sympathy, honestly, but let’s try something: from now on when it’s a grief post I’ll say so up front.
